I had my 36 week appointment this last week on Thursday and was kinda looking forward to the appointment. This is the week when they do the Strep-B test so I was figuring that I would get checked and I was excited to see if I was dilated or not! I know that having any dilation now does not indicate when I would go into labor but it is always nice to know what is going on down there.
When I arrived at the appointment they had me do my own strep test! In all reality no big deal that I did not have to get undressed for them, but just unexpected. Then, I found out that the intended parents had been there and had had a private discussion with my midwife. I was pretty floored by this as I had not anything from them about any concerns. Once I went into the room with them and our appointment started with the midwife they non-challantely told me that they were not ok with a water birth. What? I was completely blown away that this was never said to me personally and that they are deciding what I can do to manage my pain during labor. I just let the appointment progress as normal but inside was stewing from this latest news. It is true that I did not start this pregnancy thinking about a water birth, but after hearing more from the midwife about it as well as a friend of mine that has used a tub and shower during her labor, just not for delivery, (and a nice email from a trusted aunt:)) I was looking forward to the opportunity to see how much easier this labor could be with the water.
After I got home I had to call the intended parents to let it be known that I was not happy with their decision and how much it upset me that this was never brought to my attention before they discussed it with the midwife. It was a long talk and did not get me the final results that I was hoping. I am still not "allowed" to labor or birth in the water (hard to even say the words as I can't believe I am being told how I should get this little girl out). Their big concern is the intended father being in the room during the birth and I was trying to make that happen as well as keep myself as comfortable as possible which was a great reason for the water birth. I told them their other 2 options were at the hospital with an epidural, which I really did not want, but it would assure me that I would be able to survive labor pains while keeping covered in the bed or deliver at the birthing center but I need to have the ability to tell him to get out whenever I am feeling uncomfortable. After they discussed, we are still going to deliver at the birth center and I will just have to see where the day goes and how I am feeling during the birth.
I never thought that this would be the outcome or the feelings I would have after deciding to give the gift of life to another couple. I have less then 3 weeks to go (hopefully:)) and I can only pray that they go smoothly and that the relationship I have with the intended family improves after the birth. I want this little girl to know who I am and how I made her life possible as well as to see her grow up.
Only 3 more weeks!!
Sunday, January 6, 2013
Wednesday, December 26, 2012
One Month Left!
First let me start off Merry Christmas! We had a great holiday and it is amazing how fast it flew by. We had a busy day yesterday but enjoyed seeing all but one of our grandparents/great grandparents. Sad to miss the one but thankful that we were able to fit everyone else in. Today is our last day of travel/celebration before we start to get back into the routine at home.
I can't believe we are almost at the end. I am still feeling great but I think I am starting to swell a little in my ankles and feet which does not make me very happy. I don't think I had much water retention in my other pregnancies so I can only hope that it does not get much worse...I have seen others with so much more swelling! Can still see my toe joints so I count that as a blessing:) I am just dreading the sweat fest that will be coming after the delivery for my body to get rid of the excess water. Maybe once I get back on my exercise routine next week that will help too...I hate that our busy schedule (and the recent rainy weather) has kept me from getting out and walking.
I think my contractions have waned a little lately and I haven't felt as much pressure down below much either but in the scheme of things I have taken it easier lately then normal (helps having my wonderful husband home so much lately...I will miss that when work gets busy again!) I have my next appointment the first week of January, I am excited for that one as it will be the Strep B test and internal exam. I know that being dilated (or not) means nothing but it is still interesting to know if anything has been moving down there. This appointment also falls at 36 weeks and 4 days which is just 1-2 days before it would be safe for me to deliver at the birth center so having this next appointment means that we are in the safe zone for not having to be in the hospital:) As much as I dread the labor pain I am looking forward to giving this little girl to her family!
4.5 weeks to go!
I can't believe we are almost at the end. I am still feeling great but I think I am starting to swell a little in my ankles and feet which does not make me very happy. I don't think I had much water retention in my other pregnancies so I can only hope that it does not get much worse...I have seen others with so much more swelling! Can still see my toe joints so I count that as a blessing:) I am just dreading the sweat fest that will be coming after the delivery for my body to get rid of the excess water. Maybe once I get back on my exercise routine next week that will help too...I hate that our busy schedule (and the recent rainy weather) has kept me from getting out and walking.
I think my contractions have waned a little lately and I haven't felt as much pressure down below much either but in the scheme of things I have taken it easier lately then normal (helps having my wonderful husband home so much lately...I will miss that when work gets busy again!) I have my next appointment the first week of January, I am excited for that one as it will be the Strep B test and internal exam. I know that being dilated (or not) means nothing but it is still interesting to know if anything has been moving down there. This appointment also falls at 36 weeks and 4 days which is just 1-2 days before it would be safe for me to deliver at the birth center so having this next appointment means that we are in the safe zone for not having to be in the hospital:) As much as I dread the labor pain I am looking forward to giving this little girl to her family!
4.5 weeks to go!
Friday, December 7, 2012
Moving along
The weeks seem to be flying by now and that is ok with me:) We have been super busy with the holidays and activities which makes this time of year a pretty good one to be at the "end" of a pregnancy.
I have now upgraded to appointments every other week. While that means I am nearing the end it also takes a little more of my precious time...I am seriously dreading the every week appointments that will start the end of December. At the appointment last week we discussed more about the birth with the intended parents. My midwife was wonderful at supporting me in what I want in regards to my privacy and comfort level. Right now the plan is a water birth where both intended parents will be able to be in the room since everything will not be open for the world to see! But, should I feel uncomfortable in any way (and she is prepared to be my advocate if I give her the look) then the intended father might have to leave the room...the best laid plans can always change and since I have not been in this situation before I can't really say how it will all play out. Through all of this, I am forever grateful that I chose to stick with the wonderful midwife that has been with me through the last two pregnancies rather then go with someone that was closer to home and more convenient for appointments.
The baby is moving a lot now and the intended parents want me to send a video of the movement that you can see from the outside of the belly, but wouldn't you know it either happens when I am in the car, my phone is not near or she stops when I get the camera on her! I know, odd request but I am trying to give them this little connection to their baby. I feel bad that she has not been active during our appointments so they could feel her, hopefully one of these days she will work with us!
My belly is getting bigger and in my way much more! Wrapping presents is going to be a challenge this year...might have to move my station from the floor to a table for more comfort:)
Can't believe I only have 7.5 weeks to go (and based on my previous delivery dates it would be 5, 6 or 6.5 weeks to go!)
I have now upgraded to appointments every other week. While that means I am nearing the end it also takes a little more of my precious time...I am seriously dreading the every week appointments that will start the end of December. At the appointment last week we discussed more about the birth with the intended parents. My midwife was wonderful at supporting me in what I want in regards to my privacy and comfort level. Right now the plan is a water birth where both intended parents will be able to be in the room since everything will not be open for the world to see! But, should I feel uncomfortable in any way (and she is prepared to be my advocate if I give her the look) then the intended father might have to leave the room...the best laid plans can always change and since I have not been in this situation before I can't really say how it will all play out. Through all of this, I am forever grateful that I chose to stick with the wonderful midwife that has been with me through the last two pregnancies rather then go with someone that was closer to home and more convenient for appointments.
The baby is moving a lot now and the intended parents want me to send a video of the movement that you can see from the outside of the belly, but wouldn't you know it either happens when I am in the car, my phone is not near or she stops when I get the camera on her! I know, odd request but I am trying to give them this little connection to their baby. I feel bad that she has not been active during our appointments so they could feel her, hopefully one of these days she will work with us!
My belly is getting bigger and in my way much more! Wrapping presents is going to be a challenge this year...might have to move my station from the floor to a table for more comfort:)
Can't believe I only have 7.5 weeks to go (and based on my previous delivery dates it would be 5, 6 or 6.5 weeks to go!)
Sunday, November 25, 2012
Happy Thanksgiving
I can't believe how fast time is flying, the end of this pregnancy will be here before I know it! I have survived the last 3 weeks with my daughter's 4th birthday, my son's 6th birthday and Thanksgiving. Busy times and all those birthdays mean lots of cake around this house:( I enjoy making the cake and really like eating it but I have been on cake overload and I am glad the last morsel was eaten today. Now maybe I can keep my weight in check the last weeks of this pregnancy...cake always does a number on me!
We had a good Thanksgiving which started with a family dinner on Wednesday night with my mom's family. We ended up with around 37 people for dinner, all my immediate family (cousins, aunts, uncles and their little people.) I am blessed with the large family we have!
Thursday we took things slow in the morning before heading up to Galax, VA to spend the holiday with my in laws. It is always quiet up there as it was just the 5 of us and them but a good time anyway. We were able to go and cut down our Christmas trees which is an annual tradition when we go up there for Thanksgiving each year. Saturday after bringing the girls back to Charlotte, my son, husband and I went to Raleigh for the NCSU game. We had fun despite the chill in the air when the sun went down. I was even allotted a trip to Chapel Hill to get some stickers for my car and for dinner. Sad as it is, I have only been there 2 times since I graduated 11 years ago:(
We are starting our Christmas decorating today, but I have been left to do it by myself which is not as much fun so it is a slow process...the things that will get me writing my blog instead!
As for the pregnancy, I am feeling pretty good. My Braxton hicks are starting to pick up so I am trying to take it easy, at least until my OB visit this week. They don't hurt but I feel the tightening and sometimes a few per hour so something that keeps me thinking about it. I have done pretty well keeping the weight gain to a pound per week, some weeks might be 2 pounds but then I hold steady the next. Too bad I am heaver now then with any of the other kids...but March 1st will start my extreme fitness makeover to get back in shape so I can let my body do what it needs to now!
I can't believe that I am in the single digit countdown now! Only 9 weeks to go...even though that still sounds like an eternity, I know it will continue to fly by!
We had a good Thanksgiving which started with a family dinner on Wednesday night with my mom's family. We ended up with around 37 people for dinner, all my immediate family (cousins, aunts, uncles and their little people.) I am blessed with the large family we have!
Thursday we took things slow in the morning before heading up to Galax, VA to spend the holiday with my in laws. It is always quiet up there as it was just the 5 of us and them but a good time anyway. We were able to go and cut down our Christmas trees which is an annual tradition when we go up there for Thanksgiving each year. Saturday after bringing the girls back to Charlotte, my son, husband and I went to Raleigh for the NCSU game. We had fun despite the chill in the air when the sun went down. I was even allotted a trip to Chapel Hill to get some stickers for my car and for dinner. Sad as it is, I have only been there 2 times since I graduated 11 years ago:(
We are starting our Christmas decorating today, but I have been left to do it by myself which is not as much fun so it is a slow process...the things that will get me writing my blog instead!
As for the pregnancy, I am feeling pretty good. My Braxton hicks are starting to pick up so I am trying to take it easy, at least until my OB visit this week. They don't hurt but I feel the tightening and sometimes a few per hour so something that keeps me thinking about it. I have done pretty well keeping the weight gain to a pound per week, some weeks might be 2 pounds but then I hold steady the next. Too bad I am heaver now then with any of the other kids...but March 1st will start my extreme fitness makeover to get back in shape so I can let my body do what it needs to now!
I can't believe that I am in the single digit countdown now! Only 9 weeks to go...even though that still sounds like an eternity, I know it will continue to fly by!
Tuesday, November 13, 2012
Welcome 3rd Trimester!
It is official. I am in the 3rd trimester. I am still feeling great but starting to get to the "uncomfortable" stage. And to be honest, it is not so much uncomfortable but more the fact that I am losing the ability to bend over so well and now have the feeling that the baby is in my chest cavity (which she probably is!)
We had another appointment last Thursday and it went very fast and smooth, even with the dreaded glucose test. My office is a no news is good news kinda place and I have not heard that I have failed so I can only assume that all is good news:)
I did bring up the need to come up with a "birth" day plan. I feel like I am a pretty flexible person and we have done a lot to work with the intended parents but having another man, besides my husband, watch me give birth is not something that I think I can be flexible with! I saw the pools in the labor rooms when I did the tours but never put much thought into using them during my labor. but my midwife said that 90% of the moms give birth that way. I figured that I have had 3 births without water I can do another without but now I am thinking I should take this opportunity and see what all the fuss is about:) Laboring and birthing in the pool might also enable me to feel more comfortable with the intended father being in the room since I will be hidden in the water. The midwife said that even sitting next to the pool that she can't see anything in the water...and he would be nowhere close to the pool! Such things to think about and decide!!
Since my last post we had to say good-bye to our sweet dog Dakota. It was a tough day but something that needed to be done for her comfort. We were lucky to have her in our family as she was such a wonderful dog to us and especially the kids. I could not have asked for a better family dog!
Happy 4th Birthday to my sweet little girl! How fast they grow up:(
10.5 weeks to go:)
We had another appointment last Thursday and it went very fast and smooth, even with the dreaded glucose test. My office is a no news is good news kinda place and I have not heard that I have failed so I can only assume that all is good news:)
I did bring up the need to come up with a "birth" day plan. I feel like I am a pretty flexible person and we have done a lot to work with the intended parents but having another man, besides my husband, watch me give birth is not something that I think I can be flexible with! I saw the pools in the labor rooms when I did the tours but never put much thought into using them during my labor. but my midwife said that 90% of the moms give birth that way. I figured that I have had 3 births without water I can do another without but now I am thinking I should take this opportunity and see what all the fuss is about:) Laboring and birthing in the pool might also enable me to feel more comfortable with the intended father being in the room since I will be hidden in the water. The midwife said that even sitting next to the pool that she can't see anything in the water...and he would be nowhere close to the pool! Such things to think about and decide!!
Since my last post we had to say good-bye to our sweet dog Dakota. It was a tough day but something that needed to be done for her comfort. We were lucky to have her in our family as she was such a wonderful dog to us and especially the kids. I could not have asked for a better family dog!
Happy 4th Birthday to my sweet little girl! How fast they grow up:(
10.5 weeks to go:)
Friday, October 26, 2012
Crazy Busy
Where does my time go? I hate that I had a doctors appointment last week and I am just now getting to writing a post.
We had another quick appointment last week and everything is progressing perfectly. It was a quick appointment and was just the normal vitals for me and then time to listen to the heartbeat. We were going to maybe do an ultrasound but they did not do it and I did not care since I was in a hurry to get out of there and to my son's school so I could volunteer.
It was interesting to learn that my midwife is thinking about becoming a surrogate for her best friend who has trying to conceive for a few years now and has not had success with IVF either. Her main question to me was how did I feel about having to give the baby up and how did I stay detached. Such a good question! I always hoped that I would be able to stay detached like I am now, but of course I did not know how it would feel before I was actually carrying the baby. I have gone through this whole process knowing that I am helping another family bring their little one home and i think that knowing that has helped me to keep this baby out of my mind. I know she is there (especially when it feels like she is clawing herself out!) but never once have I had a connection to her like I did my own children. It also helps that I am so busy and full with the activities of my own children that the thought of having a 4th kinda overwhelms me right now!
I would feel so good if someone hearing my story and learning about my experience was then inspired to become a surrogate themselves.
So now my excuse for not getting around to writing...last weekend we took a 4 day/3 night "vacation" to the beach with my sister, 2 cousins and all our kids. We were in a 10 bedroom oceanfront house with 12 kids between the ages of 5 months and 8 years! It could have gone really bad but we were lucky and everyone had a great time. Now don't get me wrong, we had some moments (like at 6:30 am trying to keep the early risers calm and quiet) but overall we had a wonderful trip and some great memories. The weather was great and we were able to spend most of our days outside which was such a blessing for a mid-October trip. We have now decided that this will be an once a year trip, not an one and only:)
Here is a picture of all the crazy kids:
And another of a crazy mealtime:
Since we have gotten back our days and nights have been jam packed and I have just been trying to play catch up. I finally got all the laundry done and the suitcases unpacked today, 5 days later, which is so unlike me!
Yes, I am feeling good, when I have the time to think about even being pregnant! I am getting pretty big and can't believe I still have 3 months left to go! I know this last trimester will fly by as we are now in the holiday/birthday season. There is a "big" event every 2 weeks from now till New Years which then puts me 4 weeks from my due date, whew!
13.5 weeks to go!
We had another quick appointment last week and everything is progressing perfectly. It was a quick appointment and was just the normal vitals for me and then time to listen to the heartbeat. We were going to maybe do an ultrasound but they did not do it and I did not care since I was in a hurry to get out of there and to my son's school so I could volunteer.
It was interesting to learn that my midwife is thinking about becoming a surrogate for her best friend who has trying to conceive for a few years now and has not had success with IVF either. Her main question to me was how did I feel about having to give the baby up and how did I stay detached. Such a good question! I always hoped that I would be able to stay detached like I am now, but of course I did not know how it would feel before I was actually carrying the baby. I have gone through this whole process knowing that I am helping another family bring their little one home and i think that knowing that has helped me to keep this baby out of my mind. I know she is there (especially when it feels like she is clawing herself out!) but never once have I had a connection to her like I did my own children. It also helps that I am so busy and full with the activities of my own children that the thought of having a 4th kinda overwhelms me right now!
I would feel so good if someone hearing my story and learning about my experience was then inspired to become a surrogate themselves.
So now my excuse for not getting around to writing...last weekend we took a 4 day/3 night "vacation" to the beach with my sister, 2 cousins and all our kids. We were in a 10 bedroom oceanfront house with 12 kids between the ages of 5 months and 8 years! It could have gone really bad but we were lucky and everyone had a great time. Now don't get me wrong, we had some moments (like at 6:30 am trying to keep the early risers calm and quiet) but overall we had a wonderful trip and some great memories. The weather was great and we were able to spend most of our days outside which was such a blessing for a mid-October trip. We have now decided that this will be an once a year trip, not an one and only:)
Here is a picture of all the crazy kids:
And another of a crazy mealtime:
Since we have gotten back our days and nights have been jam packed and I have just been trying to play catch up. I finally got all the laundry done and the suitcases unpacked today, 5 days later, which is so unlike me!
Yes, I am feeling good, when I have the time to think about even being pregnant! I am getting pretty big and can't believe I still have 3 months left to go! I know this last trimester will fly by as we are now in the holiday/birthday season. There is a "big" event every 2 weeks from now till New Years which then puts me 4 weeks from my due date, whew!
13.5 weeks to go!
Thursday, October 4, 2012
Ok Already!
I know, I know, I need to keep up with this! I promise I am trying but I am failing miserably:( For some reason I just can't find the time to sit down with the computer and write even a little update. Could be I don't like writing or that I would rather be sewing:)
The last week and a half has been a roller coaster of emotions for our family. Probably doesn't help that I have these wonderful pregnancy hormones hanging out in my body! Last Sunday night we had a little scare with our youngest child and ended up in urgent care and ultimately at the Children's Hospital for the night. I noticed bruises popping up on her legs, lots of little bruises and not in places were I would expect to see them on a 2 year old. It ended up that she has Immune thrombocytopenia (ITP) in which her body started attacking her platelets like they were a foreign body. She had an IV treatment of antibodies which helped her spleen stop attacking the platelets early Monday morning and was able to go home Monday afternoon. We have 6 months of follow-up blood checks but it is something that will go away on its own and should not affect her anymore. Such a blessing!
After that was finally over we found out on Monday that my husband's grandmother had passed away. She had lived with my husband and his parents for many years so a huge loss to the family. I am grateful that I got to know her and see her as much as we did.
Finally, on Monday we took our black lab to the vet as she had had loose stools all weekend. Deep down I knew she has not been feeling the best but I was trying to ignore it. We found out she has a grapefruit sized tumor in her abdomen. The tumor is taking her nutrients and slowly taking away her muscle mass. We are lucky she has been so healthy in her 11 years and we will continue to do what we can to keep her comfortable and happy.
Between all this the pregnancy has not been high on my mind:( I am feeling good and trucking along. The baby is moving a lot more now which catches me off guard sometimes. I don't forget that I am pregnant but I am not completely obsessed with every little movement like I was when it was my child. I am still feeling the detachment that I have had throughout this pregnancy. Last night it did feel as though the baby was trying to kick her way out of my belly!
My weight has started to creep up a bit but I have to attribute that to the excessive sweets I ate the last couple of weeks. I have tried to keep that in check lately so I am hoping the weight gain slows down! I have been keeping up my 4-5 days a week of exercise which always keeps me a little happier:)
16.5 weeks to go!
The last week and a half has been a roller coaster of emotions for our family. Probably doesn't help that I have these wonderful pregnancy hormones hanging out in my body! Last Sunday night we had a little scare with our youngest child and ended up in urgent care and ultimately at the Children's Hospital for the night. I noticed bruises popping up on her legs, lots of little bruises and not in places were I would expect to see them on a 2 year old. It ended up that she has Immune thrombocytopenia (ITP) in which her body started attacking her platelets like they were a foreign body. She had an IV treatment of antibodies which helped her spleen stop attacking the platelets early Monday morning and was able to go home Monday afternoon. We have 6 months of follow-up blood checks but it is something that will go away on its own and should not affect her anymore. Such a blessing!
After that was finally over we found out on Monday that my husband's grandmother had passed away. She had lived with my husband and his parents for many years so a huge loss to the family. I am grateful that I got to know her and see her as much as we did.
Finally, on Monday we took our black lab to the vet as she had had loose stools all weekend. Deep down I knew she has not been feeling the best but I was trying to ignore it. We found out she has a grapefruit sized tumor in her abdomen. The tumor is taking her nutrients and slowly taking away her muscle mass. We are lucky she has been so healthy in her 11 years and we will continue to do what we can to keep her comfortable and happy.
Between all this the pregnancy has not been high on my mind:( I am feeling good and trucking along. The baby is moving a lot more now which catches me off guard sometimes. I don't forget that I am pregnant but I am not completely obsessed with every little movement like I was when it was my child. I am still feeling the detachment that I have had throughout this pregnancy. Last night it did feel as though the baby was trying to kick her way out of my belly!
My weight has started to creep up a bit but I have to attribute that to the excessive sweets I ate the last couple of weeks. I have tried to keep that in check lately so I am hoping the weight gain slows down! I have been keeping up my 4-5 days a week of exercise which always keeps me a little happier:)
16.5 weeks to go!
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