We got the first list of items that the IP would like in the contract. While I understand that they are placing their full trust in me to start the life of their new baby I was slightly taken back by some of the items on their list. I am sure their requests are common, I was just taken a little off guard. As a pretty strong woman I pride myself on taking care of myself, and did I mentioned I have already birthed 3 very healthy children, so it is hard to swallow that I now have someone else saying what I can or can not do for the next year.
This is obviously something that I am going to have to adjust to as I know it is important to provide the best for this unborn miracle. This is definitely an area that might be easier to navigate through when choosing to surrogate for a family member or friend.
Nonetheless, with a little research and careful conversation I know we will be able to come to terms that we both agree on!
Monday, November 7, 2011
Busy Week!
We made our first offical steps towards the surrogacy last week. Last Monday I went in and had blood drawn for tests (5 vials, holy cow!). I asked her all that they were testing for and of course it went in one ear and out the other. The only ones I can remember are a full thyroid panel and the gamet of STD's. It feels weird to give all this information to someone I don't know well but I know it is necessary.
Friday, T and I had to go to Greensboro to meet with a psychiatrist. I was just hoping that we would not "fail" the screening, though I am not sure what that looks like. It was a good talk and overall very easy. The psychologist asked us lots of questions and as I am sure he is a great guy I could not help but think that I was going to say something wrong. I know that he is there to make sure we are not crazy (which I am confident we are not) but it was hard to not fear that I would say something wrong that would make him look at me and say "no way should you carry this child"!
I know that things are getting crazy in my life when I enjoy our "date" to the psychologist! It is the quiet time with just the two of us that I always enjoy, obviously it does not matter where that quiet time might occur.
Friday, T and I had to go to Greensboro to meet with a psychiatrist. I was just hoping that we would not "fail" the screening, though I am not sure what that looks like. It was a good talk and overall very easy. The psychologist asked us lots of questions and as I am sure he is a great guy I could not help but think that I was going to say something wrong. I know that he is there to make sure we are not crazy (which I am confident we are not) but it was hard to not fear that I would say something wrong that would make him look at me and say "no way should you carry this child"!
I know that things are getting crazy in my life when I enjoy our "date" to the psychologist! It is the quiet time with just the two of us that I always enjoy, obviously it does not matter where that quiet time might occur.
Friday, October 21, 2011
Decision Made
We chose our family! After meeting only one family it is great to say that we have decided to surrogate for them. I am so excited that we are able to do this for them and I look forward to completing this journey with them and then to see this baby grow up. I know that this is a life long friendship that we have created.
We are now in the beginning stages of the process as we get all of our ducks in a row. I am getting my medical records from my last pregnancy to the fertility clinic as they have to look over all that before beginning anything. We will also begin working on a legal contract between us just to make sure we are all protected. Once everything is official, we will begin my required medical tests and psychological evaluation. If all goes well then we can expect to get pregnant at the beginning of they year!
We are now in the beginning stages of the process as we get all of our ducks in a row. I am getting my medical records from my last pregnancy to the fertility clinic as they have to look over all that before beginning anything. We will also begin working on a legal contract between us just to make sure we are all protected. Once everything is official, we will begin my required medical tests and psychological evaluation. If all goes well then we can expect to get pregnant at the beginning of they year!
Monday, October 17, 2011
Successful Meeting
Well, we met our first potential family and all in all I can call it a success. First off, the kids got along great! I loved seeing M, F and R play so great with someone they had only met that day. The four of us adults were able to have great conversations and get to know each other a little better then we were able to do over email.
When they first got to town we met at a park near our house. I thougth that would be the best way to break the ice and to give the kids something to do. We played there a LONG 2 hours before heading back to our house for dinner. Dinner was good, just an easy baked ziti I had prepared in case we decided to do dinner together. We ended up hanging out till about 7 or so with us adults talking and the kids playing great together upstairs.
It was great to see our families interacting and all I could keep thinking about was the time when I would be in the hospital with their child. It is so surreal to think of still but as I met this family I knew this was something I was meant to do.
When they first got to town we met at a park near our house. I thougth that would be the best way to break the ice and to give the kids something to do. We played there a LONG 2 hours before heading back to our house for dinner. Dinner was good, just an easy baked ziti I had prepared in case we decided to do dinner together. We ended up hanging out till about 7 or so with us adults talking and the kids playing great together upstairs.
It was great to see our families interacting and all I could keep thinking about was the time when I would be in the hospital with their child. It is so surreal to think of still but as I met this family I knew this was something I was meant to do.
Monday, October 10, 2011
Another Connection Made
It is kind of surreal, we are meeting a family tomorrow that could possibly be the one we chose to surrogate for. It has all happened so fast but I am excited for what is to come. I got connected to this family through the surroagatemother.com website and we have been emailing for a little over a week now. As she puts it, it is kind of like speed dating, which is totally true. We have a little bit of time to try and learn about each other on a very intimate level.
They are coming down for the afternoon so we can finally meet face-to-face. They do have a little boy already so he will get a chance to play with my three kids. I have not told my kids any thing about this or who the people we are meeting at the park are, all they know is that it is someone new to play with!
I can only hope that this meeting goes well and we decide to match. If so, I could be pregnant by early next year!
They are coming down for the afternoon so we can finally meet face-to-face. They do have a little boy already so he will get a chance to play with my three kids. I have not told my kids any thing about this or who the people we are meeting at the park are, all they know is that it is someone new to play with!
I can only hope that this meeting goes well and we decide to match. If so, I could be pregnant by early next year!
Sunday, September 25, 2011
Finally Making Connections!
I can't believe it, I am finally talking to an agency that might actually get me connected to a couple! After 2 weeks of emails with someone at an agency in Raleigh (which I found through surrogatemother.com) I am in the process as being set up as one of their surrogates. The agency currently has 3 couples waiting to find a surrogate, hopefully one of them will be the right fit for us.
I have been filling out the surrogate mother paperwork this weeknd. I am not sure what I expected when she told me she had some paperwork to fill out, but I did not expect the 17 pages I got. They want to know everything about me, my family, pregnancies and beliefs. I guess it makes sense as it is important the intended parents know exactly who is going to be carrying their child. I have a few more of the trickier questions left to answer but I am hoping to get it faxed in tomorrow!
I am not sure how long the process will take from this initial paperwork to the actual IVF but I don't see it being a very quick process. Hopefully I will learn more tomorrow after she gets my paperwork back!
I have been filling out the surrogate mother paperwork this weeknd. I am not sure what I expected when she told me she had some paperwork to fill out, but I did not expect the 17 pages I got. They want to know everything about me, my family, pregnancies and beliefs. I guess it makes sense as it is important the intended parents know exactly who is going to be carrying their child. I have a few more of the trickier questions left to answer but I am hoping to get it faxed in tomorrow!
I am not sure how long the process will take from this initial paperwork to the actual IVF but I don't see it being a very quick process. Hopefully I will learn more tomorrow after she gets my paperwork back!
Tuesday, September 13, 2011
Still waiting...
Wow, can't believe it has already been 2 months since I made the decision to begin this journey. Unfortunately, not much has happened in that time. I am still unsure of how to actually find that perfect couple that we can make into a family.
I have begun to slowly get the word out to friends in hopes that one of them will know of a couple in need of surrogate. A few have said they might know someone, but so far noothing s serious. I also joined a website, surrogatemother.com. This is a website that gives hopeful surrogates and intended parents a place to chat and meet. I have replied to a few people and even heard back from 2, but again, nothing serious happening yet. I keep praying that I will hear from that one special couple so we can begin the process.
I am going to continue to get the word out and check the website, maybe I will find the perfect couple soon!
I have begun to slowly get the word out to friends in hopes that one of them will know of a couple in need of surrogate. A few have said they might know someone, but so far noothing s serious. I also joined a website, surrogatemother.com. This is a website that gives hopeful surrogates and intended parents a place to chat and meet. I have replied to a few people and even heard back from 2, but again, nothing serious happening yet. I keep praying that I will hear from that one special couple so we can begin the process.
I am going to continue to get the word out and check the website, maybe I will find the perfect couple soon!
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